Within reach of my final destination
Just a little further, one last push
To reach it, the ultimate place.
It won’t be long now.
I’ve travelled for so long
Waiting for this moment
It’s time to seize it.
Let’s run for our lives.
Not to save them, but to make sure
They’re entwined for eternity.
Forever.
And ever.
Nothing can separate us because
We’ve taken control.
Now, let’s do this together
Before second thoughts possess us.
Take my hand.
Take the leap of faith.
Take control.
Now the sky could be blue
I don’t mind
Without you it’s a waste of timeCould be blue
I don’t mind
Without you it’s a waste of timeCould be blue,
could be grey
without you I’m just miles awaycould be blue
I don’t mind
Without you it’s a waste of time
This is ridiculously relevant to my life. I guess everyone feels like this at times… I’ve felt like this for months in a sad way, but now I’m happy about it. It doesn’t make sense really, but I was so happy yesterday I think the happiness spilled over and made something sad something happy.
Three years on from the terrible, tragic events of 7th July 2005, let us spare a thought for those who died, their families and their friends. Let us be thankful for our emergency services, who were key to delivering a quick, effective and life-saving response. Let us be thankful that we know if this happens again, people will, like they did 3 years ago today, not panic after a bomb has exploded metres from them, but rush to help those around them and save lives. Let us be thankful that further attacks in 2005, 2006 and 2007 were thwarted – sometimes due to the stupidity of those trying to carry out these despicable deeds.
I have no doubt that terrorists will attempt, and it is highly probable that they will at some point succeed, to indiscriminately kill more innocent people in our country, be it in the capital or elsewhere. I have no doubt that they will continue to seek to divide us and to scare us. However, I have no doubt that they will not succeed in dividing us and scaring us. For that is the strength of the people as a whole – they fight, but not with murderous attacks. The resilience shown by those who travelled by tube the next day is a testimony to how we will stand strong against those who seek to hurt us and we will prevail. Our numbers are far, far greater than theirs and even if they strike us, we will get straight back up and be ready to retaliate with love and moral compassion – our ‘weapon’ to be used against them.
This feeling was echoed by many on 7th July 2005. Scott Mills rounded off his show with the song ‘Tubthumping’ due to high listener demand. The lyrics “I get knocked down, but I get up again, you’re never gonna keep me down” represented the defiant attitude of the people in this country. A small, seemingly anecdotal fact, but one of great importance nonetheless.
I think that Ken Livingstone, ex-Mayor of London, has said it best, so I shall end this post with his wise words.
| Ken Livingstone wrote: |
| Finally, I wish to speak directly to those who came to London today to take life.
I know that you personally do not fear giving up your own life in order to take others – that is why you are so dangerous. But I know you fear that you may fail in your long-term objective to destroy our free society and I can show you why you will fail. In the days that follow look at our airports, look at our sea ports and look at our railway stations and, even after your cowardly attack, you will see that people from the rest of Britain, people from around the world will arrive in London to become Londoners and to fulfil their dreams and achieve their potential. They choose to come to London, as so many have come before because they come to be free, they come to live the life they choose, they come to be able to be themselves. They flee you because you tell them how they should live. They don’t want that and nothing you do, however many of us you kill, will stop that flight to our city where freedom is strong and where people can live in harmony with one another. Whatever you do, however many you kill, you will fail. |
It’s 09/05/08 (at the time I begin writing this post, although it could be tomorrow when it is finished). This is probably a day that passed normally for many people – nothing of importance really occurred for many, like most days. However, for myself, it truly was the end of an era. I’ve been at my secondary school for five years now and I’ve loved so much of my time there. I’ve never really had any ‘enemies’ and I’m the sort of person who isn’t really disliked by those who don’t know me well. I’m polite to everyone, bar a couple of people, and I’m only rude to them occasionally – but this isn’t unwarranted rudeness. However, this post isn’t meant to be full of malice and spite, which I am more of capable than at times – yet I hide this from everyone rather well – I think perhaps my best friends might know, having spent years with me, that I can be horrifically malicious and spiteful if provoked into being so, and perhaps it even scares them a little. Admittedly I find it a little scary too – it’s not a side of myself that I show to the world often at all, but when I do, it’s destructive.
Where have I been? It’s a good question. I’ve not been away as such, but I felt that I couldn’t blog any more – no creativity; a lack of things to say and moreover a loss of ‘zest’ as Rita put it. I’m going to remedy that though and start posting more frequently – it is something I enjoy, when I finally get my act together and start doing it.
So, what have I been doing with my time whilst I’ve been doing everything but blogging? I’ve been working really hard for school – with my exams coming up, I’ve had revision to do, coursework to edit and homework to be bored by. I’ve been playing games – Mario Kart Wii, Team Fortress 2 and Portal mainly. I’ve been furthering my political knowledge, reading the Guardian website every day. The results of the local elections, the London Assembly elections and the London Mayoral elections were all most disappointing for my political party (which I am a member of) Labour. They lost hundreds of local council seats, lost seats in the London Assembly and lost the Mayoral race. Anyway, the race in America to be the Democratic nominee for the November election is hotting up, and I really think Hillary can win it. Another couple of primaries are tomorrow – good luck to her!
So I’ve got exams coming up – they begin next week – lasting about 5 weeks, which will be stressful and tough, but hopefully I’ll pull through and get the grades I’ve worked so hard for over the past two years. I will no doubt post a little of my revision in further posts to remind me of key facts!
-Tom.
Breaunna Bishop – the best person I know who I haven’t met. Bre introduced me to everything. Leaky. Rita. Pottercast. She helped me to meet everyone and get to the point where I stand a good chance of good things happening to me. She is wonderful – funny, kind and loving. She’s a huge Harry Potter fan. I love her. I can’t post loads of pictures yet. I can’t write essays – because we haven’t yet met and I don’t want to waste a post that I could make so much better in six weeks. Six weeks until we meet. Believe me Bre, I really, cannot wait. I love you.
ifancyifancythetrio.
The one and only filthy half-blood of the Harry Potter fandom, Rita ‘work it’ Gill, turns 19 today. I love Rita. She’s crazy, she’s spontaneous, she’s hilarious and she has a passion for all things Marks & Spencer. She isn’t just a person. She’s an awesome time-travelling, death eater busting, ‘SNAPUH’ shouting friend. When I say friend, I mean ‘the picture frame Luna has in Deathly Hallows’ type friend. One of my best friends. A true friend.
I met Rita on the best day of my life. The day we spent queuing for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. I’ve talked about it so much but I never get bored of talking of our epic meet. Rosi and I would take it in turns to walk around the streets looking for her and each time we would come back, having not found her. Mani arrived and I was chatting with him and I played on a game he brought [thanks Mani!] so Rosi offered to scout for Rita this time. She was gone for over five minutes so I knew, I KNEW, that Rita was here. My heart was racing and I was so excited to finally meet this girl who I had spoken to so many times – we’d been looking forward to this for so long. Rosi appeared round the corner with a huge smile on her face and I shouted and screamed and jumped up and down and then Rita came around the corner and I did so even more, before screaming ‘RITAAAAAAAA!’ and running into her with all my might and we had the most painfully tight hug imaginable. The rest, they say, is history – to milk a cliché!
I love Rita because she is so crazy and spontaneous. Whenever we have an insane moment [which happens SO OFTEN when I'm with her in London] that needs filming, she has the camera out before I even realise the insane moment is happening. We just see so many strange and funny things and end up in hysterics every five minutes. You can’t be sad around Rita [unless you're leaving her] because she’s so upbeat and excited! See you in MAY!
I think rather than writing pages and pages [which I could, because you can't find enough adjectives to describe Rita] I’ll let you read Bre’s entry [click on Blogging Bre on the Links bar] because so much of it is just what I want to say. Instead, I’ll post some pictures and comment on them.
I think I’m going mad. I’ve been feeling tired for the last few weeks – a constant feeling of tiredness and I just can’t seem to sleep properly either. I’m having recurring dreams – no matter how they start or end, there is a constant in them and it won’t leave them. It confuses me to no end and I don’t know why I’m dreaming like this or how this is happening but now that it’s a constant I don’t know if I want it to stop or not. It’s so confusing and I just don’t know what’s going on there. I feel like I’m Harry, getting closer and closer to what he wants/needs to know/needs to see in his dreams in Order of the Phoenix and I can finally completely empathise with him in that situation. I need to know more.
I’m feeling ill a lot of the time. I had a headache for three days but I think the tiredness is making me feel ill – so it’s not necessarily an isolated issue.
Emotionally, I’m tired too. I feel bipolar and there’s never a long time at the top of the world until I’m crashing back down to the bottom. I hate sadness. I hate feeling sad and I hate seeing people being sad.
I’ve come to realise something too. Something that I thought to be true for a while and now I am pretty certain it is true. I know it to be true because of an event during the week that made jealousy course through my body, burning my insides and making me feel physically sick at the thought of something happening that someone was writing at the time. I hate it being true. It complicates things in a very bad way and I fear that it will lead to me becoming a cruel and unforgiving person for a while. I can’t help but feel these intense emotions – anger, jealousy and selfishness. I feel like I’m Mr. Brightside. The song lyrics suit the situation so well and the fire burning inside me is going to consume me if I’m not careful. I need to tread carefully or I’m going to burn away and the cinders left behind of me will be spiteful, cruel and full of hatred. I can easily see myself becoming Anakin Skywalker, or perhaps even Tom Riddle. Two emotions contrasting emotions that I never could see the link between before have now formed an iron bond and I can’t separate the two, try as I might.
I need a blue sky holiday. I need to be able to relax and change my scenery. I count down the days until I’m in Chicago and away from these things at home that could break me. Chicago will give me a chance to put the above paragraph out of my mind and give me plenty of distance. I need to see some different faces to the daily usual and just try and forget about this main issue.
I doubt anyone reading this will understand fully the big paragraph. It’s almost impossible for them to do so. I’m too cryptic sometimes. Too wrapped up in myself. Too difficult. Too solitary, in the sense that I don’t ask for assistance nor actively seek to get others to help me with things. That’s probably my problem.
I need rest. I need a break. I need help.
I awoke early this morning, around 08:30. I had had little sleep – I had only gone to bed just before 02:00am as I’d been chatting with Mani (and Marti, James and Jason – although they retired before myself) and my parents were out at the Brit Awards, so there was no need for me to go to bed at an approved hour. I ate some Weetabix for breakfast and then showered. Having been enjoying the rest I’ve had from school over the last few days, I’d left it until the last minute to pack for the short trip to Oxford. I hastily threw Twilight into my bag – I was determined to continue reading this book. I started reading it a few weeks back, but I failed to manage the great amounts of work I had and therefore had no time to read it. I also put my Nintendo DS Lite, iPod, camera, associated chargers and of course, my laptop into my bag. I wasn’t sure if I’d need my laptop – but if there was internet available for free in the apartment then I wasn’t going to turn down late night or early morning Skype sessions! My mum called me for the fifth time and I rushed down the stairs.
During the car journey, which lasted around two hours, I listened to the Super Smash Bros. Brawl soundtrack – some of the tracks are very impressive. The orchestrated main theme for The Legend of Zelda that also has a choir singing the notes is stunning. Whilst listening to the soundtrack, I read Twilight. I read around one hundred pages – it felt good to read something at a slow and relaxing pace, unlike my usual rushing of books. I’m quite enjoying Twilight - parts are very interesting, but other parts feel a little slow. I’m desperate to know all of Edward Cullen’s secrets – has he fallen for Bella, or is he just wanting some haemoglobin? What sort of vampire is he? Is he going to hurt her? What will happen on their trip to Seattle? I’ll be finding that out in the coming days, I’m sure.
As we drove into Oxford, I was rather unimpressed until we drove deeper into the city and started passing the immaculate, old and great University buildings. We drove into the car park for the apartment we’d be staying in for the next few days and I suddenly felt quite tired – my six hours of sleep were taking their toll. We couldn’t check in until 2:30pm and it had only just gone midday, so we set off to eat some lunch and look around some colleges. We found ourselves outside a Wagamama, which we all enjoy eating at, so we walked inside and I ate a delicious meal of Chili Beef Ramen – if you’re ever at a Wagamama restaurant, you must try it – it’s wonderful.
After this, we walked down the road towards Exeter college [Oxford University is divided up into 31 colleges] where we were to meet the head of the PPE [Politics, Philosophy and Economics] Society. This was a great chance for me – I am very interested in doing a degree in PPE and this proved invaluable – she gave me a good insight into the course and life at Exeter college and Oxford University as a whole. Following that, we walked across the small street into Jesus college and stood in the entrance hall [or Porter's Lodge, if you want specifics]. Out of nowhere, a smiling and friendly man appeared – he introduced himself as the Bursar of Jesus college and asked if I was a prospective student – to which I replied ‘yes’. He gave us a lengthy description of the college facilities, what it could offer me and I was extremely impressed. How often are you in an establishment and are treated so well? It really did make a good impression on me. Next, we walked down a small alley and found ourselves outside the grand Bodleian library – every book or newspaper that has ever been published in the United Kingdom can be found in this building. Three miles of shelving are added every single year, just to accommodate the releases for that year. We’re taking a guided tour tomorrow, which I can’t wait for. A door opened whilst we stood in the entrance and I saw the Hogwarts infirmary flash before my eyes – scenes from Prisoner of Azkaban began to flicker in my mind.
We left the library and walked for around ten minutes, until we reached Magdalen college [pronounced 'maudlin']. I was filled with happiness when I saw the beautiful architecture that surrounded me – no buildings I’d seen before had looked so stunning. As we explored the grounds, I suddenly breathed in sharply and my parents turned round to look at me – I’d seen the area of Hogwarts where the Gryffindor first years learned to ride a broom for the first time. Scenes from Philosopher’s Stone were retrieved from the library in my head and I found myself whispering that one word – ‘up’. It was a truly magical moment. We continued to walk around to grounds and I marvelled at the immaculate lawns and the inspiring buildings – they will be perfect for a certain project a few good friends of mine are going to start working on soon.
Having finished looking around the colleges we had planned to see today, we meandered through the alleys and streets, working our way back towards our apartment. We checked in and found the apartment to be very pleasant. I had a milkshake [a very delicious one that I'd purchased in the covered market] and I munched on a freshly baked cookie, also purchased from said covered market. I then got out my laptop and started typing up this blog – there’s internet here, but I have to borrow an ethernet cable and pay an unnamed fee, so I probably won’t be online until I get home. This blog will be posted as soon as that happens, I assume. We’re going out to see Iranian comedian, Omid Djalili, tonight and I can’t wait – he’s a very funny man and makes jokes about himself – I love people who joke about themselves.
Feeling very inspired – I’m as close to Hogwarts as you get!
-Tom.
There will be plot details of episode 12 of Prison Break in this post, so do not read on if you plan on watching it.
Prison Break was absolutely insane. Gretchen’s snide remarks, Michael’s cunning plan and sheer awesome scripting and acting made for an astounding episode. I’m still reeling, 4 days later. I can’t believe Whistler ran! What are Michael and Lincoln going to do now? How are they going to pull this off? Will L.J. end up like Sarah? I bloody well hope not! Rumours are circulating that Gretchen gets shot next episode, but I hope she doesn’t die. She’s so hilarious, yet evil. Prison Break Season 3 Episode 13 – The Art of the Deal – airs on Monday in the U.S.A.. I can’t wait to see the explosive (mid) season finale.
-Tom.
